Two old tasteless political jokes

This one is from the period when the Clintons were trying to get a health care plan done:

Hillary Clinton is taking a tour of a hospital with a doctor and they come across a man who is masturbating. She asks the doctor for an explanation and he says “He has a very rare condition that causes him to produce too much sperm and this is his treatment”

Later, they see a man getting a blow job from a nurse. Clinton asks for an explanation of this man’s situation. The doctor says “He has the same disease as the other man but he’s got a better health plan.”

I don’t know if I remember this one exactly the way I heard it years ago but you’ll get the punchline anyway:

George Bush goes to hell and Satan says “I’m going to give you three options.”

They go into the first room and there is JFK with flames licking at his feet. Bush says “I don’t want that.”

They go into the second room and there is Richard Nixon covered in snakes. Bush says “I don’t want that either.”

They go into the third room and there is Bill Clinton getting oral sex for all eternity from Monica Lewinsky. Bush says “I like this. I’m going to stay here.” Satan says “Alright. Miss Lewinsky, you can go now.”

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